Music Inspired By Life’s Losses And Victories With Singer-Songwriter Beza

Music Inspired By Life’s Losses And Victories With Singer-Songwriter Beza

[00:00:00] John Cordray: So we're gonna talk about something a little bit different in this episode, and I'm actually really excited about it in the music that you have been hearing in all of my episodes for season two. You may have noticed if you've been listening for a number of years, that this music for season two is different, and I intentionally selected this music to be the intro theme of the.

[00:00:27] John Cordray: Because of the, of the words and it, it resonated with me and I think it resonates with the show and resonates with you. And so I have the pleasure of being able to bring on the writer and producer and singer of that song, and then I cannot wait to introduce her to you coming up right after. Oh, 

[00:00:48] Beza: don't worry about today, or things we cannot change.

[00:00:53] Beza: It's over the past, we can 

[00:00:56] John Cordray: erase. Welcome to The Mental Health Today Show. My name is John [00:01:00] Cordray and I'm a licensed therapist and the host of this show. And as I just mentioned, I am very excited to talk about this. We're gonna be talking about music inspired by life's losses and victories with the singer, songwriter, and producer.

[00:01:17] John Cordray: So Beza or Belinda is a Chinese American music producer, songwriter, and artist who is passionate about using music to bring healing, hope, and restoration. Bea's signature sound combines the honesty and poetry of a singer-songwriter's music with the groove of an ear candy of pop creating a unique blend of depth and fun.

[00:01:40] John Cordray: If I can say that. After completing a degree in music production and audio engineering from Berkeley College of Music, vea worked at high-profile studios in LA and Nashville and went on to create her own studio space to host sessions. Her projects have amassed over a million [00:02:00] streams, and she has engineered and worked for high-profile artists and projects, including Carrie Underwood.

[00:02:06] John Cordray: Pantos. Carmen A Star is Born. Yes. The movie. And Coco. Yes, the movie. Additionally, Besa is also an active musician and has appeared on the Late Night Show with Seth Myers and the Recording Academy's online series Grammy Res play. Bea. Belinda, welcome 

[00:02:27] Beza: to the show. Thank you so much, John. Super excited to be here and thanks for having me.

[00:02:32] Beza: Oh, the 

[00:02:33] John Cordray: honor's all mine. I'll tell. When I was working on and thinking through about season two of the show, I knew I wanted something new of more a fresh sound in music. And I wanted something that encapsulated the actual theme of the show. And when I came across your song, it just resonated with me. And it was like, it [00:03:00] clicked almost immediately and I, and I thought to myself, Wow, that.

[00:03:05] John Cordray: That's cool. And the title, The title is gonna be okay. Yeah, Yeah. And the sound, and the words, the lyrics, it all made sense and I was just really excited to, to get that out there. And we'll say people have made comments on it and they really like it. So I'm thrilled that you were able to come on the show and be willing to do that.

[00:03:29] John Cordray: Cause I know you're busy, you have a lot of projects going on, . 

[00:03:33] Beza: Yeah, no, the pleasure is, is all mine and I'm super glad to hear that people actually like it and that you resonated. So much with it as well. That's really awesome. 

[00:03:43] John Cordray: Yeah, absolutely. And so speaking of the song, before we get started to learn more about you and about that song, I wanna play 30 seconds of that song and because I don't think anyone who is listening has actually heard the entire [00:04:00] song that least 30 seconds of it.

[00:04:02] John Cordray: And I wanna play that and then we're gonna come back and then talk about that song. 

[00:04:07] Beza: Cool. Sounds. Oh, don't worry about the day or things we cannot change. It's over the past. We can Oh, it's gonna be Just know are coming. They're coming our way. Way. It's gonna be ok. Gonna be ok. It's gonna be okay. 

[00:04:39] John Cordray: Okay. So the lyrics of that song is just amazing and your voice, by the way is, is amazing as well.

[00:04:49] John Cordray: And Oh, thank you. You're welcome. So it just, it did, it resonated with me a lot and I think it resonates with my audience as well. If you can remember, cause [00:05:00] I know you record a lot, of song, if you can remember what came from that song, how did you come up with that? 

[00:05:08] Beza: Yeah, I feel like it was during the time where, I mean, I guess still now, where just the, the political climate and also just the climate in general of, of our country was a little bit heated.

[00:05:24] Beza: And so, yeah. I think, yeah. And the first verse, maybe it, it has hasn't played, but it was about. Kind of just like the news and what we're hearing and, and I just feel like there was a lot of negativity and pessimism going around, and I just felt like that wasn't helpful for anybody. And so I just wanted to write something about addressing that.

[00:05:48] Beza: Yes, there's real things that are happening that are hard, but at the end of the day, it's better to be. Hopeful about things and optimistic. And that's really the only way to move forward and to actually [00:06:00] thrive and to be happier. And so at the end of it, I was just like, it's, it's gonna be okay. All these things are happening, but let's be optimistic and that'll make us happier and that'll help us be better people.

[00:06:13] Beza: And that'll hopefully make yeah, the world a better place if we're just more optimistic as people and things are gonna work 

[00:06:20] John Cordray: out. I love that and it is gonna be okay. And I know some, some people who are listening who are really struggling with anxiety, depression, or some other mental health issue, there are days where they feel like it's not gonna be okay.

[00:06:34] John Cordray: And there's a lot of struggle and a lot of heartbreak and a lot of hopeless nights. And you had mentioned before in your own life that a lot of the songs that you make and. Really come from personal experiences. And would you kind of tell us a little bit about that? 

[00:06:58] Beza: Absolutely. Yeah. I [00:07:00] think music or just art in general is, yeah, just such a creative outlet to express the ups and downs of life and, and I just really.

[00:07:11] Beza: Am compelled by the concepts of like opposing things. So like loss versus like restoration or like defeats versus victories or like depression versus hope. And I think that as humans, we're always living within the tension and the struggle of like two different opposite things. Being able to write and express what it's like, kind of being in the middle is what's really compelling to me.

[00:07:40] Beza: And yeah, so a lot of what I do write about ends up being. About what I go through that's really difficult, but also the journey kind of through these things and maybe even like a perspective from the other side of coming through these things. And so yeah, I've definitely experienced personally just, yeah, what you've mentioned with [00:08:00] sleepless nights and like despair and hopelessness, feeling like nothing's ever gonna be okay again.

[00:08:05] Beza: Like I lost this thing, or this relationship, or this goal or this dream, and it's gone forever. Nothing's ever gonna be the same, but, but just being able to walk through even years, taking years to walk through things and seeing how everything is somehow like coming together still. And yeah, like, so I definitely drew draw a lot from my own experiences and walking through things and what the process is like for me as I go through them.

[00:08:34] John Cordray: Well, I think it comes out so it's hard to pinpoint. It can almost sense it that your hurt and your pain and your past came out in the song and you know that that is something that I think the moment I said, this is it, and I was just envisioning when I was listening to the song before I actually chose it and started using it, I was [00:09:00] envisioning it that my, my listeners would be listening to.

[00:09:04] John Cordray: and maybe late at night they can't fall asleep, or maybe they went through a breakup or they're experiencing deep, dark depression and they feel like there's no hope. I was envisioning those people who are struggling with their mental health listening to this and being encouraged because I can think it, from what you just said, it comes from personal experience, and there's something to be said by that because you're not just writing to write a song.

[00:09:33] John Cordray: You're writing it because there's meaning to you behind it. 

[00:09:37] Beza: Yeah, definitely. I think authenticity or like the way that art connects to people is that it has to be authentic and, and one of the things that I realized kind of in my early twenties, like after I finished college is that you can't give what you don't have.

[00:09:55] Beza: And so, I've always wanted my music to be a [00:10:00] source of like hope or inspiration or, or healing for people. But I had to go through hard things in order to have anything to, to even tell or to talk about or to give in that. Yeah, in that sense. And so at the end of college I had gone through like a really hard, like toxic and like codependent relationship, and I went through like 12 step with a mentor about like, yeah, coming clean from, like being addicted to this person and all this.

[00:10:32] Beza: And, and coming out of the other side of that I was like, Oh, wow. Like I kind of had. Light bulb moment and realized that if I wanted to release healing in my music, I had to have gone through depression or like if I wanted to release like hope, like I had to be through a season of despair. And so when I came out of that, I was like, Oh, wow, there's a lot more purpose to my suffering than just the [00:11:00] suffering itself.

[00:11:01] Beza: It's like in order to have anything, we have to go through the opposite thing. And so that's been a really big theme for me is, is going through difficult things. It's realizing that. That's what's actually forming value in your life and what's forming like inside of you. The the Pearl really? Or like the value or the diamond, like through the pressure or through the crushing.

[00:11:25] Beza: That's what you're gonna be able to give away to people through, through music or, or just through conversation or as a person. But you have to go through these things to have anything of value to be able to give. So yeah, 

[00:11:38] John Cordray: that could be a. 

[00:11:41] Beza: Yeah. My next one, . 

[00:11:43] John Cordray: No beautifully said. And I think that when, when someone hears that, Someone who is doing well now and, and then they talk about a struggle that they had.

[00:11:55] John Cordray: They might be tempted to be thinking, Well, you're feeling better now, so it's easy for [00:12:00] you to say, but I'm still here in the depth of my depression and I'm in the darkest hour of my life. It's easy for you to say that, but what you said is so true and we don't know what tomorrow. Hold. And we as humans, we, we don't want to feel bad.

[00:12:19] John Cordray: We don't want anxiety, We don't want the depression. We don't want to be codependent on somebody or addicted to things. We don't want that. And yet we find ourself experiencing things that we don't want. We can't do anything about it, but we have to hang on to the hope that tomorrow is a better day. It's a new.

[00:12:42] John Cordray: And that's one of the things I loved about the song because it, it talks about that and from what you said just in your own personal life, that you had a lot of struggle and you know what it's like to feel depressed, you know what it's like to be in the darkest hour. [00:13:00] And so people can resonate with that as well.

[00:13:04] John Cordray: That's fantastic. I'm really curious to learn a little bit more. I read this in your bio, you worked with some high profile artists, and that's pretty cool. I'm sure it was with various different projects, but with Carrie Underwood, Pens, Carmen, the movie of Stars, Born and Coco, the animated movie. You don't have to say in every one of those, but what sticks out to you from working with those high.

[00:13:35] John Cordray: Projects. 

[00:13:37] Beza: Yeah, I, I had different stints in, in pretty big studios in Nashville and then in la so for, Yeah, like the Carry Underwood and Pentatonics and, and that kind of stuff. Yeah. That was, that was in Nashville and that was while I was still studying production and engineering at school and. . Yeah, I think for me [00:14:00] it was, it was kind of a dream come true cuz I grew up as such a country fan and I've always wanted to be in Nashville.

[00:14:06] Beza: I'm from LA and so I've always wanted to go to Nashville and meet kind of my country heroes. And so Carrie Underwood was definitely one of them. The studio was owned by Reba McIntyre, who is another one of my heroes, and so I actually got to meet her as well. . But yeah, it was, it was just a great experience.

[00:14:26] Beza: I was able to feel really close and it's like what I've always kind of envisioned was pretty tangible and that was cool. Cause I feel like my whole life I've been working towards music and I've wanted to do music since I was 12. And so I think when I was at that studio, I was about 19. So it was, yeah, it's been a journey in music for sure, and what I've really been focusing on my whole entire life.

[00:14:56] Beza: And so to be able to work at these big studios and [00:15:00] on these projects that a lot of people are listening to is pretty rewarding and, and fulfilling for sure. Yeah. I'm just really grateful too. A lot of people can work really hard and still not attain their goals. And so I'm just grateful that I was able to have opportunities come my way and that what I've been working for, like really paid off.

[00:15:21] Beza: So yeah, it was, it was an awesome experience. 

[00:15:25] John Cordray: Well, that's really cool and I really liked the fact that you said that at age 12, You knew you wanted to do music, you wanted to pursue music. And we all know when we're little kids, we all have dreams of what we want to do. And maybe the adults in our life might say, Oh, that's nice, but it's probably not gonna happen.

[00:15:45] John Cordray: When you were that young, did you have people who were telling you, No, it's not gonna work? Or did you have people in your life to say, You know what, you need to, you need to pursue this? 

[00:15:55] Beza: Yeah, I. I would say I didn't, [00:16:00] I actually had a lot of opposition, but now people are supportive. But yeah, growing up I'm like Chinese or Taiwanese, and so culturally, I'm first generation and my parents were immigrants, so the idea of doing something art related or music related was just.

[00:16:21] Beza: Part of their grid. So it was definitely a very uphill battle for many years cuz I was always a great student at school and was kind of the quintessential like Asian, like good student and was studying and doing all the extracurriculars, but then, Something about music really ripped me when I was, Yeah, in middle school, about 12 or 13, and I just knew that right then, like in my gut, that I was supposed to do music for just like my life.

[00:16:54] Beza: Like that was kind of like my purpose or my destiny was just supposed to be doing music and writing songs and [00:17:00] producing, so I just kind. Completely dedicated, like all of my free time outside of school to learn and to practice instruments and going to like vocal lessons and guitar lessons and drum lessons and spending all my Saturdays like 10 hours, like in like the extra room and using the closet as my vocal booth and figuring out like reading big manuals like of how to run the software.

[00:17:25] Beza: And yeah, and my parents, they. They thought it was a hobby at first. And then when I was like, No, I'm, I'm only gonna apply to one school, like I'm only applying to Berkeley cuz I know that like, that's the best school for contemporary music and production. So that's just the only place I'm gonna apply.

[00:17:44] Beza: Like this is my destiny. Like there's no plan B for me. And they were like, Oh my god, it's real. So they, they freaked out and so I had to . I ended up having to practice in secret for many years. , they were really displeased with [00:18:00] that. And so like at midnight, I would put like a towel under the door and turn on my light, and I would practice guitar like really late.

[00:18:07] Beza: Or I would write songs and. Yeah, so it, it was definitely a very uphill battle and all my peers, it's very, I grew up in a very Asian community as well, so all of my friends, they were kind of in the same head space, and their parents also were very against me doing music as well. So there was definitely something in me, I think, that gave me the persistence to keep going.

[00:18:34] Beza: And so when I did come down to the audition for Berkeley and I like made it and got a scholarship, that's when things kind of started turning around. My parents were like, Oh, maybe you are supposed to do this. And like, I don't know. They actually didn't know that I had practiced in secret for years until like recently and

[00:18:54] Beza: So it's, it's been quite the journey for me. Pursue what I really [00:19:00] felt like was right and give up like the Ivy Leagues and I could have applied to this and that and I had like great GPA and everything, but I just, I just ended up not even taking my s a t cuz I was like, I Berkeley doesn't need that and I just need to audition.

[00:19:13] Beza: This is where I'm supposed to be, so I'm just gonna do that instead. And ended up just going for it. So it's been a journey for sure. 

[00:19:22] John Cordray: Wow. So despite all odds, From a very early on, you knew what you wanted to do and you had tons of opposition and it was very difficult. I, I would imagine. But you kept going something in you just, just told you keep going.

[00:19:39] John Cordray: It's gonna be worth it. And obviously it's worth it. And now you're doing some amazing work. So well done. Congratulations. That's an amazing backstory. Thank you for sharing that. 

[00:19:51] Beza: Yeah. Thank 

[00:19:52] John Cordray: you so much. Yeah. Here's my question for you about music. Yeah. Now I know [00:20:00] different types of music for me evokes a lot of emotion.

[00:20:04] John Cordray: Mm-hmm. and a lot of times it's music of when I was younger and I associate music with a certain period of life, like a teenager. And I, I just absolutely love all types of eighties music. I just love eighties movies, music. So tell me a little bit. About how you believe maybe your theory, if you will, of music, how music then speaks to the soul and can bring out hope and restoration in someone who is struggling with their mental health.

[00:20:39] Beza: Yeah, I think for me, understanding, I guess maybe the dynamic. Of just a human being. So as far as I understand it, like having a physical body, but also having a soul, which is the mind will and emotions, and then also having the spirit being the essence of who you are. [00:21:00] I think that music can affect you on, on all three dimensions.

[00:21:05] Beza: And so obviously physically, like when you listen to music, you. Groove to it, and you feel it in your body and it, it moves you and rhythms move you. And then in the next dimension, like with your soul, which is like your emotions and your mind I think that it can also touch you there and invoke through the lyrics or, or also just through the texture of the sounds or the chord progressions that make you feel emotional or react a certain way.

[00:21:37] Beza: They can reach you on that level. And I. On a spiritual level, it can also touch that dimension because it can go beyond your mind in a sense. So it can almost like touch you beyond like logic. And so I think the power to me of music is that it could really touch the deepest steps of like [00:22:00] who you really are in a way that a lot of other.

[00:22:05] Beza: Mediums or forms of entertainment or other things like can't or, or maybe like can't as easily, but when you listen to something, it could really touch, like you're not even thinking about it, but it's invoking something in you. And I think that people who create music like. Carry certain things, like what we talked about earlier.

[00:22:26] Beza: You can't release what you don't have. And so what you do have, what you're creating is releasing that thing. And so even in kind of like the unseen dimension, like spiritually, I feel like if I have the, the intention of writing something that's meant to be hopeful out of a place of pain, I think that.

[00:22:48] Beza: That actually comes through in a spiritual sense because my intention is I'm creating it for that purpose, and so it's connected to the art that I'm making, and so when someone listens to it, they can actually feel [00:23:00] that intention. So yeah, I think that music is really powerful in that way because it can touch you on so many levels and it can be a really powerful tool to.

[00:23:12] Beza: Yeah, to help you get through things or even just to feel like you're understood or empathize in some way and, and even to give you strength to keep going. And I've had songs like that that have really helped me to hold on when things were really hard and to have hope when things were really dark and so, Yeah, I think that those experience of music for me is, is what I hope that people, other people will experience what I 

[00:23:37] John Cordray: write.

[00:23:38] John Cordray: I love that. And one of the things that I encourage people do for their self care is listening to music. Oh, I love that. And call me music. Not, not the, not music, that that would invoke anger, but calming music and for the very reasons that you just, So very well said. Thank you so much for [00:24:00] that. And so, alright, so we're getting close.

[00:24:03] John Cordray: We have a few more minutes left and one of the things I like to ask all of my guests, it's about self care. As a therapist, I talk about self care all the time. Yeah. And the importance of self care. Can you tell us what are some things that you do for your self care? 

[00:24:21] Beza: Yeah, I love to. Have a morning routine, so I, I also need a lot of sleep because I apparently am a hypersomniac, or it's like the opposite of insomnia, , where I need a lot of sleep, so I'll make sure that I get.

[00:24:41] Beza: What I need. So nine to 10 hours a day, and that's kind of one of my most important self care is that I'm rested. And then in the morning I'll kind of have like a quiet time where I do like meditation and. . Yeah, just think through like what I'm thinking, what [00:25:00] I'm feeling, what are my goals for the day or for the week.

[00:25:03] Beza: And I also will think about different people in my life in that time and I might reach out to a couple people and just check in and yeah, other self care things. I love to go hiking and like go to the beach, be in nature. That helps me a lot and. I love to do puzzles, so at the end of a long day I'll just put on a show and do a puzzle, and that's helpful for me to just kind of like wind down.

[00:25:31] Beza: But yeah. Yeah, those are some of the things that I enjoy. Oh, that's 

[00:25:34] John Cordray: great. I like that. And one of the things that, Several things that you mentioned that I encourage my clients to do is get plenty of. but also develop a morning routine. This is so often, especially nowadays, there's so many people working from home and that are remote and they might sleep in because they can and cuz they're not commuting and they sleep in and they get up right before they go [00:26:00] to work and they open their.

[00:26:01] John Cordray: Their laptop and go get right to work and there's no downtime, no wind up time. And so morning routines, like you mentioned that you do can be very helpful for that. And I know it's something that I look forward to for, for myself is the morning routines and I get up really early, but it's really quiet and I love it.

[00:26:20] John Cordray: I love that time to myself and there's a lot of things that I do to get ready for the day. So I like, I like what you just. What, what you do for self-care and puzzles. Oh, I love puzzles. It's been a long time since I've worked on a puzzle. But I do love puzzles too. Yeah. So fun. Yeah. . Well, again, I just wanted to just really thank you for coming on and taking time out of your production time and I hope you are encouraged that I selected your music because it definitely, to me it's a good match.

[00:26:54] Beza: Mm. Yeah, I definitely am very flattered and and yeah, very encouraged for [00:27:00] sure that you felt that way about it, and I'm super grateful. 

[00:27:03] John Cordray: Oh, great. Well, if somebody wanted to reach out to you, I don't know if that's something that you do. I don't know if someone was interested in talking with you or do you have a way where your fans can reach out to you?

[00:27:20] Beza: I think maybe. Like my email would be a good place to, to be in touch with me and yeah, we can go from there. 

[00:27:28] John Cordray: Okay. And do you have a 

[00:27:29] Beza: website as well? Yeah, it's just belinda wong.com. 

[00:27:34] John Cordray: Nice. So we'll put that in the show notes as well. Awesome. Nice. Well, thank you again and I want to thank all of you who are listening to this show, and I hope you have been encouraged by listening to Belinda, or better known as Besa, and I hope this was an encouragement to you not just learning about the backstory of the song, but to [00:28:00] hear her story that she did not have it.

[00:28:04] John Cordray: And she went through a lot of heartache and a lot of pain to get to where she's at. And I think that comes out in her music and I think you would agree. Thank you so much for listening. I appreciate you as always, and continue to work on your mental health because the Mental Health Today Show has been championing your mental health since 2015 Ticket.

[00:28:26] John Cordray: Bye.